Mines Goggles?

Alright, time to explain the title of this blog like I promised... in song. Well, I'll explain it regular, then I'll drive the point home with a song. OK, first off, I go to the Colorado School of Mines, an engineering school and a geek school in every right. Most notably, the male:female ratio (affectionately known as the bro:ho ratio) is something like 10:1 (they tell us it's 4:1, but I think they're lying). With the extreme lack of feminine influence, the women that do exist at Mines (and everything else, by the way) slowly becomes more and more attractive. This phenomenon is known as "Mines Goggles," a close relative to the more common "Beer Goggles." Unfortunately, many at Mines choose to combine the two effects, leading to disasterous consequences and really ugly babies. But I digress. Now that everybody's on the same page, here are the lyrics to the song "Mines Goggles" (written by myself and Adam the R.A., vocals usually by myself, and guitar accompaniment by Fat Mat himself).

Chorus:
Back home never looked so good. (Omit first time only)
I've got goggles on my eyes and I don't know what to do.
Mines Goggles on my eyes and I'm lookin right at you.
Goggles on my eyes, you look better than you did before

Give it a month or two and I'll be ready to jump your bones.
Nothing I can do to control these wild hormones.
Your medicre body shakes me to the core.
Helping people get laid since 1874.

Chorus

You'll look like Cindy Crawford on a double shot of Jack.
Let me grab my goggles and it's time to hit the sack.
The first time that I saw you, you weren't worth a second glance.
But now I've got my goggles and there's a tent up in my pants

Chorus

Mines Goggles! Mines Goggles! Mines Goggles take me away! (repeat 2x)

There you have it, the official unofficial Mines theme song. If anybody would like to propose a new verse, feel free to leave it in a comment on this post. There's always room for more.